Nicola

Nicky: Interview 18/1/06

I first had problems at the age of nineteen and MS was pretty much diagnosed then. I had pins and needles in both feet, which would progress upwards as far as my rib cage and would turn to numbness over a couple of days. Each relapse lasted up to four months, sometimes affecting both arms as well as both legs. Not long after it started I began having  problems with my left eye. I have various eye conditions, such as tunnel vision, due to nerve damage. That never gets better in between relapses.

I had quite dramatic limb relapses every 12 to 18 months for 10 to 12 years. Then the pattern changed to having more regular relapses, shorter periods of remission in between and more classic MS symptoms, such as fatigue, loss of balance and muscle weakness. The progression over the last 4 years was that relapses were getting far more frequent. In the last 2 years, the relapses were almost running into each other with only one week in between. I felt it was changing into progressive MS. A lot of steroid treatment did not help. Homeopathy and acupuncture helped me feel better in myself but did not touch the actual symptoms.

Then I came to see John during a relapse. A period of remission then began which has just continued and continued, up to today. I’m feeling very strong physically and a lot better in all ways and on all levels. What was remarkable to me was that at the end of last week I started feeling pins and needles and the floor seemed to be rocking. I did an intense half hour of ‘head wiggling’ (as taught by John) and by the next afternoon it had all cleared. In the past that would have been the start of a long horrible relapse lasting months. Being able to shift it in a matter of hours was nothing short of miraculous.

It is having my life back again. It is like fantasising about winning the lottery and then winning it and not knowing what to do with it. I want to go back to work now, which I have not been able to do for eight years.

I’m still quite bewildered and shocked by the changes in me since November. I don’t understand it. I can’t analyse it. To some extent I have to accept the improvement and go with it. I feel very excited about it but I’m trying to rein that in, taking every day as it comes. It’s because I’ve felt so good since I’ve been seeing John that it’s a long way to fall if I ever do relapse again. But so far I haven’t. It is hard to believe after years of being told ‘there’s nothing we can do’. It is overwhelming to feel so well in just a few weeks.

MS is so destructive in all aspects of life: work, personal, emotional, physical and social life. When the MS is not there you get all those things back again and start having choices again, in all areas of your life. In the past I would wake up in the morning and think ‘What can I do today?’ Now I think ‘What shall I do today?’ Now I can do what I want and not just what I can manage. Where before the future seemed to be closing down to a narrow tunnel, with me becoming less and less able, now it is all opening out again and I can choose what to do.

Sorting out emotional problems in my past was very important for my psychological being – an intrinsic part of the process. I can’t imagine being so much better without sorting out that stuff. I saw a psychologist twice at a hospital as part of an MS MOT. I described what I thought were the issues, but I realise now I was way off. With John, I can’t bullshit him – he has cut to the real root cause of the problem. By looking beyond the words and working non-verbally, he has been more accurate and more effective.

As for my physical symptoms, I hardly ever use a stick now for walking. I still pace myself, but I don’t know if that is being 41, not nineteen. I’ve got 100% more energy. I almost feel normal, which is an extraordinary feeling. Before, I couldn’t go out for an hour without getting so tired that I needed someone to take me home. Now I can go out for hours and drive myself around. I have not had this level of well-being for many years.

It is having my life back again. It is like fantasising about winning the lottery and then winning it and not knowing what to do with it. I want to go back to work now, which I have not been able to do for eight years.

I can plan things now, which is a big luxury and very exciting. Before, I never knew how I would be the next day so I couldn’t plan to do anything new. Each day was a repetition. I couldn’t go on holiday, because twice I had to cancel at the last minute because I was too ill to go. Now I can plan my life and do something with it instead of treading water. My MS dictated to me completely. Now I’m back in control of my own life. It is a daunting prospect, but it is all good.

I am quite cynical about alternative medicine. It was desperation that got me here. I’ve met people in the past who have made wild promises and clearly not known what they were talking about. I approached this with an open mind but a lot of scepticism. John’s confidence inspired me, and then the results speak for themselves. I think you need a willingness to be honest and open to it. But it is fine to ask questions and not understand it and be cynical. Nothing can take away the results. I know what has happened to me and there is no denying that.

Report June 2013

Nicola had a baby soon after learning the Boulderstone Technique. They call him their miracle child as they thought they would never be able to have one.

Nicola is doing fine, keeping things at bay by doing the exercises when needed. She is very grateful for the Boulderstone Technique for allowing her to live a normal life.

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